Existential Question Time in Tatacoa Desert

When travellers get together there are a few things they inevitably end up talking about.
First there is the expected ´where are you going? / where have you been? / where are you from?´ - a boring necessity.
Second there´s the ´did you transit Miami´ discussion which usually involves recounting all know USA border nightmares.
And third there´s the ´what do you miss about home?´. For Brits the list is usually a roast, Marmite and proper chocolate. For me, it´s duvets.
So imagine my delight when we arrived in San Agustin to discover our room had a duvet. A beautifully warm, soft, perfect example of a duvet. For four nights it was bliss, but then we had to move on. Well obviously I couldn´t go straight back to being cold at night. I need to be let down gently so, en route to Bogota, we thought we´d stop in the desert.


As you do.

El Labaryinth

El Desierto de Tatacoa is a somewhat surreal place. For one thing you just don´t expect a desert to be there. The jumping off point for Tatacoa is a leafy, green town called Villavieja. The only thing about its typical plaza that hints of anything unusual is the statue of a giant prehistoric sloth replacing the usual one of Simon Bolivar. But a quick mototaxi ride takes you into the Sloth´s old stomping ground, now turned to desert. Tatacoa is not a sandy desert a la the Sahara but looks more, I imagine, like Arizona (the boyfriend who watches a lot of golf confirms this). There are two sections, the more impressive and smaller red part and the larger, sparser grey part.


Our surreal few days began when our taxi driver dropped us at the Observatory where we were greeted by Xavier, the Astronomer, like old friends. Jokes were made about him joining us in the tent before we wandered out to a small hill which was to be our bed for the night. Xavier enthusiastically started tackling the tent whilst Mike and I stood looking bewildered, not sure how to help. Suddenly the two police officers who had been leaning against the observatory watching thought they would join in. Soon the age old question ´how many people does it take to put up a tent´ was answered... two gringos, two policemen and an astronomer.

With our bed for the night all ready we set off to explore the part of the red section known as ´El Labaryinth´ - the name turned out to be pretty apt. Thinking we were sticking to the main path through the towering rock formations getting back shouldn't have been a problem. Except it was. Turns out most cacti look the same and one rock dune is much the same as another. We eventually made it back before dark fell but only just and only after a somewhat unorthodox clamber back to the mirardor.


Evening activities were limited to lying in our tent, with the flap open, gazing at the stars and pondering the mysteries of the universe. The next day we awoke early in order to complete a 16km hike before the midday sun. There is just one road the runs through and in to the desert making getting lost fairly difficult even for us. Our hike took us through cacti fields, across rugged bolder strewn landscapes and across cracked, red earth - all without leaving the road.

The grey part

As strange as the the landscape was the Colombians themselves decided to provide us with far odder sights. On our way in to the desert I had giggled at the sight of two people, on a motorbike, leading a horse. But Tatacoa added to this with three people on a motorbike with a lamb and then two people on a motorbike with a calf. Why and where the lamb and calf were headed I have no idea but I hope they enjoyed the 50kmph ride.


After one more disgustingly hot attempt at El Labyrinth we headed back to Villavieja and on to Neiva. To the Boyfriend´s disgust he was, as usual, shunted in to the back of the camionetta (a jeep taxi) whilst I got the warm inside. However when we set down in Neiva a lopsided smile assured me all was well. ´I have been speaking the universal language of banter´ he cryptically declared before revealing he had been swigging aguardiente  with the locals whilst I had been making polite conversation with the driver.


Typical.